Long time no blog

This post is for the encouragement of anyone who needs it. I heard an interesting teaching at allelon that I'm close to buying into. (It was out of the mouth of Winn Griffin, a man who has the look and feel of someone who's gone more than a few rounds with Jesus, I'm glad he is who is.) It has to do with the "gifts" of the Holy Spirit. The thought is that the word translated into "gifts" is rooted in the word translated into "grace" in other parts of the Scriptures. The "gifts" then could be better understood as "grace-lets," or specific custom extentions of God's grace that he is giving, not really to the person who is delivering the gift, but to the person, persons, or world being served by it. We, as Christians, act as servants, or delivery persons of specific packages of God's grace to people who need it, and towards whom God has decided to speak or act in a certain way. This is what it means, in part, to be co-laborers with God, or to be "jars of clay," or "earthen vessels." I find great beauty in that.

I couldn't help but remember as I was hearing this teaching that the latest cover of Andrew Murray's book, Humility, has a picture of just a white empty dish on it. Scripture (Philippians) says that Jesus "emptied himself and took on the nature of a servant." I don't think you can separate this nature, this chosen emptiness, from our identity as spirit-filled people, as servants, and as the ministers of the reconciliation--the reconciliation that God has chosen to give to the world and to each human being within him or herself. He wants to bring people out of the kingdom of darkness into the light-filled kingdom of his wonderful son, Jesus, where they will be made right--with themselves, with their neighbors, and with God. But this being made right with God and people is linked to the dropping of our stuff to pick up God's stuff, so to speak. We give ourselves over to the kingdom or reign of Love, to "life in the Spirit," to God's economy and His way of "life." Have you ever tried receiving love and not giving it? Or receiving Love and hanging on to other stuff? Have you ever tried to give Love from your own resources? Give up! Drop all your stuff! Give in to God's Kingdom! Embrace the reality that God's Love does rule now and will rule all. I need empty hands and an empty heart to be blessed and to be a blessing. . . holding things lightly in our hands . . . How many of our gifts actually get delivered? Am I a dishonest postal worker? I think I am.

I love you guys.

Redesign

Finally finished the redesign of the rest of whatischurch.com to match the blog. Look it over, check out the content (not much new, just looks better), and tell me where I messed up.

The more I read about everyone's time out in Boise...the more ticked I get that I didn't go. There was just no way. We just didn't want to leave Jackson again..and I just can't travel in "my condition". Big and fat and mildly sick at any given time. Let's just say I would of really ticked my husband off before we even got to Boise.

So...... I really want to throw Relax Fest 03. We kind of joke about it but I am more serious than joking. I don't know.. kind of like a big family reunion where all the family including wife and kids come. We eat tons of food enjoy each others company and tell stories...lots and lots of stories. Only there has to be one thing that is clear up front...... we don't have a house like the Priddy's. Not even close:-) I don't know maybe a big blue tarp down by the beach. We all can sleep in sleeping bags...kind of like my missionary days with Operation Mobilization or YWAM.

One can dream...I guess that is why we are doing this...we like to dream....big, fat, scary, no way in the world this is gonna happen except that God does it kind of dreams. I like that.

Spreading the Blog-Love

Allelon staffer Eric Keck (aka Dallass Keck) is now blogging. From a recent post...

"just had a dream about blogging, i must have a new addiction: in it i heard a voice say to be careful what we write, because these things get read by more people that we know. then i heard / then i was shown the image of the Rialta (Mark Priddy's Winnabego and family car) and was reminded that if were not careful crap will come out. (read the hilarious story by Ryan Hale on 1/25/03; 10:46:35 PM) i think it was just a reminder that although this can be a killer tool to keep us all together and going in one direction, that if we don't watch it, or overload it, we'll just . . . be letting out a big judd's."

By the way, I was there when the 'crap came out' of that Winnebago. Seems my buddy Rob Graham got a little excited behind the wheel and ran right over a curb. It totally destroyed the piping from the bathroom and spewed, well you know, stuff, all over the parking lot of this burger joint, Big Judd's. T put the moment in proper perspective: "Hey, we just dropped a load on Big Judd's!"

Allelon Trip Report

Well here's my effort at a trip report. Instead of repeating what was said there (a lot of that you'll be able to get at the website soon), I'm just going to provide some commentary from my angle. It'll be long so I put it in article form...

The Bishop's View of Allelon

Teaser quote: "On Friday afternoon Todd Hunter posed a very simple yet challenging question – “How do you act as a leader in a community of people who are supposed to be following Someone else?” Now that is a question that demands some extremely honest wrestling amongst people who are actually attempting to lead in faith communities. In truth, as Todd aptly communicated, it creates a situation where the leader finds him or herself in the middle of an identity crisis."

Praise God from whom all blessings flow!

I always think of single moms when Mike is traveling.. it is a very tough life. Mike is back from Allelon and I am very thankful. Not just for me, and all the cool stories, but for Jackson. He really misses daddy when he is gone. We kept him up late to greet daddy at the door..a quick wrestle and then to bed.

I wanted to tell a story of how God taught me a little bit more about his kingdom and the harvest through my child. Sunday AM we went to Dunkin' Doughnuts to by a few sugary treats for our Sunday morning gathering. (FYI - we are meeting at the Freemans until further notice due to weather issues....like it has been freakin 'cold') We pulled up and there was a homeless guy sitting out front and Jackson starting pointing and saying "See...See" I was in task mode and not interested and so I pushed through into the store to stand in line. As we were in line my child started to talk to everyone. "Hi... Copee (aka - coffee) light...baby... Mommy" etc. He was rattling words off so fast I hardly had time to tell the lady what we were ordering. He was making friends with everyone and smiling from ear to ear at all he saw. We sat down and it was then that I started notice who he was talking to.

If you want to know where the "real people" are...and sometimes living in this county I wonder...go to Dunkin' Doughnuts on Sunday morning. Young adults who spent last night out doing who knows what, the elderly, young families with 5 kids (all under 5 and all in pajamas), day laborers, and many other people who probably were not thinking about church or God or anything except another day of surviving. Maybe I am being melodramatic, but God was showing me something.

Jackson spoke, waved, and smiled to everyone in the place without judgment or fear or even wanting anything from them. He was happy to be there and to address them and was excited about doing it. Not only that, he wanted to "see" the homeless guy outside much more than Mommy or most grown ups want to "see". He was hearing Jesus much more than I was. So I thought if he still wants to "see" the guy when we leave, we will go over and talk to him. Sure enough the first word out of his mouth was "see" and over he went...dragging mommy along behind. He walked up and did not even notice the smell, or the clothes, he didn't care about anything externally except connecting with that person. It was beautiful. He handed the man a doughnut and called him "buddy" and then said "goodbye" and off we went. I have been formed a little more today and left desperately wanting to be more like a child.

Sorry if this seems disjointed...my 17 month old wants to help and it is difficult to make a complete thought.

In the Salt Lake City airport. Allelon (All-alone) was great. Much more to come about the last few days.

Well, we've hooked up with fellow bloggers Kevin Rains, Alan Creech, and a few others. We're walking around downtown Boise and I'm blogging from a little cafe onwed by a guy that goes to a Calvary Chapel here. Cool place. Anyway, it's been fun meeting folks from all over, sharing stories etc. One guy flew from Australia. He wins the distance prize.

T says Hi by the way. More tomorrow perhaps.

We're here. Boise is cold, but check this out...

Boise, ID - Today
Jan 23 AM Fog / PM Clouds 45°/36°

West Palm Beach, FL - Today
Jan 23 Partly Cloudy / Wind 73°/33°

Hahahahahahahahahaha.

Isn't it ironic, don't you think?

So Mark starts out the book club... "The first rule about the book club, is that there is no book club." It was pretty cool I must say. Some very good questions that I wish I had time to elaborate on here but I can't. Must get ready to leave for Idaho.

I hope to blog a little from Idaho but we'll have to see. I don't think there will be anything hi-tech like wifi, it's not that kind of conference (there will be no superfriends present, with the exception of Todd Hunter of course.)

Anyway, I'm really looking foward to the trip. Going to miss the boy and the wife a bunch. Love you guys.

Mid school year for me is tough. I usually have a lag right before Christmas and then after Christmas I reach a manic state again soon to be followed by depression. My friend Kent Green (he works with me at Youth for Christ) wrote a haiku poem to enter the saturn ion haiku contest. If you win, you get a snowboarding vacation for 4 to Aspen. So I'm trying to get all my friends to get all their friends to vote for Kent's haiku. I really need the vacation. If you go to www.2003ion.com, click on Detours and then "road haiku." Kent's is called "Away from North," and it's really very good. It would be cool if you would vote for him every day, cause he said he would bring me with him to Aspen. And it's really beautiful.

I'm really bummed that I'm not doing the book club... we're having a book club on The Challenge of Jesus. I would love to hear how last night went... someone fill me in on what you're learning!

Also, I could really use some prayers. It's a disobedient season for me, and my heart isn't too excited about changing that. Maybe Aspen will help humble me!

Our True Selves...

This jumped out at me this morning in John 4. The woman at the well says, "Well, tell me this: Our ancestors worshiped God at this mountain, but you Jews insist that Jerusalem is the only place for worship, right?" Jesus respondes by saying, "Believe me, woman, the time is coming when you Samaritans will worship the Father neither here at this mountain nor there in Jerusalem. You worship guessing in the dark; we Jews worship in the clear light of day. God's way of salvation is made available through the Jews. But the time is coming--it has, in fact, come--when what you're called will not matter and where you go to worship will not matter.
I'ts who you are and the way you live that count before God. Your worship must engage your spirit in the pursuit of truth. That's the kind of people the Father is out looking for; those who are simply and honestly themselves before him in their worship. God is sheer being itself--Spirit. Those who worship him must do it out of their very being, their spirits, their true selves, in adoration.

Who am I really? Am I a sinner just scraping by hanging on to Christ's coat tails or as 1 Corinthians 1:2 says, "All who are in Christ are saints." Why do I always feel so unrighteous when 2 Cor. 5:21 says, "I am the righteousness of God in Christ." Before Christ I was indeed dead but in Christ my spirit is alive--it is my true self--not what my mind or religious programing has always said I am, a worm, a lowly pathetic sort of sinner and sort of saint. "Since it is the presence of Jesus in the spirit that gives it life, our identity is simply that we are in Christ! He becomes our life. --Steve McVey "For in Him we live and move and have our being, as also some of your own poets have said, 'For we are also His offspring." Acts17:28 or as Eugene Peterson words it, " We live and move in him, can't get away form him! One of your poets said it well: 'We're the God-created.'

I have been very convicted lately that my mind needs to constantly be renewed in God's perspective of his children, not what I have always thought to be. I no longer have an 'Adamic' nature my very nature is Christ. 2Cor.5:17
Such a small mental shift of truth has changed the world for me.

Grace and Peace to all the Saints in Christ Jesus both here and around the world:

David expressed what I am feeling much better than I can...so I thought I'd let him do it!
Psalm 111

Praise the LORD!
I will thank the LORD with all my heart
as I meet with his godly people.
How amazing are the deeds of the LORD!
All who delight in him should ponder them.
Everything he does reveals his glory and majesty.
His righteousness never fails.
Who can forget the wonders he performs?
How gracious and merciful is our LORD!
He gives food to those who trust him;
he always remembers his covenant.
He has shown his great power to his people
by giving them the lands of other nations.
All he does is just and good,
and all his commandments are trustworthy.
They are forever true,
to be obeyed faithfully and with integrity.
He has paid a full ransom for his people.
He has guaranteed his covenant with them forever.
What a holy, awe-inspiring name he has!
Reverence for the LORD is the foundation of true wisdom.
The rewards of wisdom come to all who obey him.
Praise his name forever!

I have not the strength to blog.

I can wholeheartedly relate to pastor/autobodyrepairmandude Kevin Rains about juggling many roles - see his post from Jan. 17th. At work we have a massive deadline on Tuesday right before T and I leave for Boise and Allelon. It's going to be a scramble over the next few days to take care of stuff there, keep up with bills, house chores, a pregnant wife, and a 17-month old, and introduce a few new folks to our community at our gathering on Sunday. Ahhhh!

So tonight I do not find myself waxing eloquent on anything. No articles to be written, no posts that will launch a thousand ships. Just visions of valves, dreams of ducts. All the while aware of God...active...creating, connecting, completing me. Doing his behind-the-scenes assembly of a life and a community of lives. Kingdom work in a kingdom way.

PS - If you ever want to reach me at work and surprise me, my email (and MSN messenger screen name) is mike@rgdengineers.com. I'll probably be there tomorrow afternoon:)

I am reading Streams of Living Water by Foster again. It seems that I find myself reading this book about once a year. Just lots of stuff to absorb. This passage hits me where it hurts. I think good books should do that.

The foundational structure for growth in grace involves training of the body, mind and spirit by means of disciplines of the spiritual life. These Disciplines are well recognized activities of prayer and meditation and study and fasting and solitude and service and worship and celebration and much more. All these activities are ways by which we quite literally present our bodies as "a living sacrifice" to God (Rom 12:1).

By undertaking Disciplines of the spiritual life that we can do, we receive form God the ability to do things that under our own steam we cannot do, such as loving our enemies. The Disciplines, you see, place us into the divine stream of things in such a way that God is able to build within us deeply ingrained habits of "love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness and self control" (Gal. 5:22b-23a) (page 88)

I have finally gotten a quiet moment to just enjoy the blogs of my family. It is so amazing to see your thoughts and hearts here at home. I was outside enjoying this gorgeous South Florida day with my new puppy, Dezi, while reading Colassians and something Paul writes in his opening greeting caused longing in heart. "...asking God to give you wise minds and spirits attuned to his will, and so acquire a thorough understanding of the ways in which God works...We look at this Son and see the God who cannot be seen. We look at this Son and see God's original purpose in everything, above and below, visible and invisible, rank after rank after rank of angels--everything got started in him and finds its purpose in him. He was there before any of it came into existence and holds it all together right up to this moment. And when it comes to the church, he organizes and holds it together, like a head does a body...From beginning to end he's there, towering far above everything, everyone. So spacious is he, so roomy, that everything of God finds its proper place in him without crowding. Not only that, but all the broken and dislocated pieces of the universe--people and things, animals and atoms--get properly fixed and fit together in vibrant harmonies, all because of his death, his blood that poured down from the Cross." Colossians 1and 2
What encouragement to the Body of Christ, what encouragement to us here in this particular community that is just a small part of the Living Temple. How awesome that we are not a random pile of stones and it is not up to us to somehow place them in perfect order to make a sound building. My hearts cry in prayer is that we would rest in the truth that God is building His spiritual house. He has placed His living stones in Christ and is gathering us together all the while shaping and perfecting each for that special placing. We are all so different and there are so many facets of Christ that can be seen in one another. I am thankful for what we have. I am excited to see what Father is doing. I am content to just learn and grow with one another and let Him do the building.

OK - this week has been a little crazy so far. Monday I sprained my ankle and spent the afternoon in the ER. I had to get another ultrasound just to check on the baby. She is fine and yes it is a girl. I am still in shock over that one, although Mike had a feeling all along. Then this morning I had to go to court to contest my ticket. I have to pay court costs, but essentially it is as if I never got a ticket in the first place. We had a good time with the Vineyard folks over in Tampa. They were really in to experimenting with worshiping in an authentic way for them. They even created a station that allowed those in their community that were deaf to enter into worshipping God completely. (What do deaf people do who can't hear the worship band and sing along with every one else?) It was a blessing to see them come together as a community and create a totally authentic experience that drew them closer to the Lord. I can't wait to see what comes together here.

It's been a hard week being in the place that God has called me. I have been flirting with "The grass is greener over there" ideas. There is no greener grass than the grass I am standing on. This is where God has called us and I am thankful...even on the hard days!

The friendly folks at Next-wave.org published an article of mine this month on their webzine...

This Way of Life - A Rethinking of Acts 2:42

Last Saturday I told Amber that I don't think I'm gifted to influence the institution from within. I'm a people-pleaser... scared say the wrong thing, scared of my own scattered communication. With that in mind, I had been really questioning whether I was supposed to remain in the ministry I'm currently involved in with Youth for Christ. I've been praying and I feel God calling me to continue talking to girls in Girl Talk... and it's a good thing I realized that this week, cause I've got a volunteer retreat this weekend. Our focus is on inner healing and rest for the volunteers, but I am doing a couple of "talks" and it's hard to imagine that I won't say something slightly offensive with all that God has been doing in me. We are sticking to the norm in many ways... we're opening with singing for 2 of our discussion times, although our last time together will begin with a time of silence.
Our idea of exploring worship is a little scary to me, too. I'm afraid that when I tell my parents what we're doing they're going to think I'm involved in the New Age! I'm also afraid I won't be able to let go of the box. I don't really like the box. The box doesn't do a whole lot for me, but it is comfortable. So I'm going to talk to Jesus about ways that I worship that can benefit the community, and hopefully he'll graciously lead me on this journey.

"Most simply take the best of what’s out there and load it into their church like a pirated piece of software. Worship is not a closed-source system like Windows XP. It is open-source code; free to be handcrafted bearing the mark of unique creativity and gifts."

Doctored up this image tonight preparing for our trip this weekend to mission242 in Clearwater. Amber and I are going to talk about our experiments in alt-worship and how our community is moving forward in discovering what it means to be a worshipping community. We'll also be speed-planning with them a worship experience for Saturday night. Should be fun.

Here's a letter I sent out to our community this week - "Looking Back, Looking Forward - Becoming a Worshipping Community". (Richard Bott's blog had a hand in the title). We are beginning a period of discovering what worship looks like in our community. In the letter I argue that worship is "all the actions combined that put God at the center of our minds and hearts." This includes concrete, historic practices like prayer, singing, meditation, preaching, reading scripture, celebrating the Lord’s Supper, but also organic practices unique to who we are – meals together, watching and discussing a provoking movie, helping another clean their house.

Worship in community is not a cookie-cutter, microwaved endevour. It is a process, unique to the gifts and creativity expressed in an actual group of Christians following the Holy Spirit. Copying what 'works' somewhere else is a ridiculous notion. This must be discovered, almost stumbled upon, imperfectly, slowly, patiently. (read more)

Since November I have only been working 2 days a week, and it has been great. It reminds me of the period of rest that God gave to Mike and Amber just before Jackson was born. I have been enjoying every minute of it. I thank God for this wonderful gift. It has been a time to read some pregnancy/parenting books, do my regular chores around the house without being exhausted, and, of course, SLEEP. I am thankful that God taught us about rest during those first few months of starting this community in PBG.

Mark and I are about to have one of the biggest transitions in our lives. The baby should be here in just a few weeks. Last night I was asking God "what have I been doing for You lately?" And God reminded me that being a parent is discipling a new person into God's family, just like sharing Christ with your neighbor or co-worker. So as I spend time preparing myself to be a good mother, I am doing something spiritual and beneficial for God's Kingdom. God established holidays, traditions, and memorials for this purpose, to expand his Kingdom to future generations.

God is faithful and never changes!

Amber's brother, Nate, left for the Gulf on the USS Teddy Roosevelt last night. He's a NFO (Naval Flight Officer) in a sqaudron of S-3B's. Please say a prayer for his safety and that Jesus would guide him during his eight months at sea.

Defense Wins Championships

Congrats to the Buckeyes, national champs for NCAA football. You've made my life easier living in South Florida as a Gator fan...don't have to listen to those Hurricane fans for another year.

I know the rest of the world plays the 'real football' - what we yanks call soccer - but man college football can be fun to watch.

I've been very uncomfortable lately. I guess that is not a bad thing it is just a description. Let me try to explain, although I know that it will be hard to convey in words. Have you every wanted something more than you want most anything else? (A dream, or vision for a group of people) I guess the dream of living life with a deeply committed group of people who desperately love God and each other more than anything else and through that change the world around them has captured me. So deeply in fact that it hurts. And the only way I know of releasing any pain or frustration I have over it is to pray. I guess I have to keep putting this whole idea back on him anyway. It's his not mine. Besides it is too heavy to try and carry on my own (let alone implement).

So in case you have not figured this out yet....there is no plan b. We've put all our eggs in the Jesus basket and we are just crazy enough to believe that he is alive enough to lead us more deeply into his kingdom. I guess I am just tired of apologizing for not having any better plan than that.